Some of you may have heard of Tony Robbins, probably from his wildly successful TED talk “why we do what we do”? The world famous motivational speak has received over 17 million views for that one 20 minute video. I loved it so much i wanted to share it here.
Watch Ted Talk :Why we do what we do
Tony Robbins is known mostly for his concert like motivational seminars. At these events you will see thousands of people screaming “MAKE YOUR MOVE! SAY YES! SAY YES!”.
The crowd usually goes wild as the inspirational giant leads everyone into a peak state right before they walk across a bed of fiery, burning hot coals—a metaphorical experience for being unstoppable.
Most people will make the mistake of assuming he is just a self-help guru, even though the title of his recent NETFLIX documentary counter argues this. “I AM NOT YOUR GURU”.
Tony has one of the most experienced track records of helping successful people achieve their goals from George H. W. Bush, Bill Clinton, Mikhail Gorbachev to Princess Diana. I think we can all take note from someone like this!
He is also credited for transforming the lives of 50 million people from 100 countries through his audio, video and life training programs
My wife Hannah & I recently sat down to watch his documentary “I AM NOT YOUR GURU” and were so touched by the 2-hour experience we thought it would help so many of you on your own personal journeys if we shared it. So if you take only 1 thing away from this blog post, i hope you take the time to watch it.
Watch the trailer :
Above is a trailer of the documentary and you can watch the full feature here. Continue reading to find out what amazing things I have learned over the years by following Tony Robbins and how you can implement the life changing practices into your own life.
1. Trade your expectations for appreciations
Most of us go through life learning to accept what we tolerate. By that I mean if it doesn’t break us we learn to live with it.
Mixed anxiety & depression is the most common mental disorder in Britain, with 9% of people meeting criteria for diagnosis.  & 4-10% of people in England will experience depression in their lifetime.. That’s a very worry statistic. Despite the amount of antidepressants being prescribed we still don’t seem to be curing this problem.
Sadly feeling the way that so many people do is a pretty miserable way to live. By trading our expectation for appreciations we can become more grateful. A Regular practice of feeling grateful is proven to better equip the body at releasing the hormones required to feel happy.
Regardless of how rich our financial or material life is you can still feel a wealth of positivity. One of the lessons Tony Robbins teaches is to trade these expectations of life for gratitudes.
Try thinking in terms of your work:
Option a: “Work makes me feel stressed, tired, fed up, I would much rather be doing something else”
Option b: ” I’m grateful for being able to do a job that allows me to buy food for my family and spend time with them at the weekends”
Which option makes you feel better about yourself? By using sentences in these terms you are actually coveting gratitude. This is life lesson number 1.
What can you feel grateful for right now?
2. Where focus goes, energy flows
I once watched an interview of Tony Robbins and will never forget the message. Our mind can not tell the difference between what we experience and what we vividly imagine.
If we shift our focus to something we would love to have, our mind & body experience the same emotions.
The law of attraction is at play here too. Do you ever wonder why when you wake up in a bad mood you seem to have a crappy day? This is because your mind is already in a state of negativity. Your mind then searches for things to support this.
The same happens with positivity. Change your psychology by focusing on positive goals like that dress you would love to fit in, and you will put more energy and resources into achieving your goal.
Try this exercise taken from Tony Robbins himself :
- What is something that you want to accomplish in the next 36 months?
- Why MUST you achieve it no matter what?
- What is one small action you can take right now to get started?
- What are some 6 and 9-month goals that you can set to hold yourself accountable?
One thing I love to focus on is our customers. We are in the personal training business because we love to change lives. If we’re focused on how we can add more value to our clients, we’ll consistently find ways to help transform their lives and self-worth.
If you are focused on your excuses for why you can’t achieve something, you will empower that limiting belief more and more.
The next life lesson I learnt was to get better at focus you need to ask better questions. It’s our questions that direct our focus.
If we really think deeply we all will find a single question that drives our life. For me it’s as broad as “Will I ever be successful enough, as a father, as a husband, in my career”.
What is your question?
It can be a good exercise to rewrite your question, this can have a profound effect on the story you keep telling yourself and ultimately the way you feel about yourself.
3. Be results-focused rather than activity-focused
Work backwards. How would you know you had arrived if you never had a destination? Choose the destination before you set off.
We need to shift our minds into thinking about long-term visions for our health, relationships, career, finance and any other aspect of life we want to make the most of.
I used to get caught up in the day to day of everything, writing to-do lists, downloading planners and researching strategies. Until I read the following quote.
Most people overestimate what they can do in a year, and underestimate what they can do in a decade” – Tony Robbins
What’s your long-term vision for the following 3 things?
By focusing on the end result the mind starts to begin coveting resources to make it possible. You will begin to feel an overwhelming shift in your mental state.
4. A small change is sometimes all you need
It’s incredible the impact that small changes in our lives can have way down the road. Take golf for example.
If you strike the ball 1 millimeter to the left or right you are gonna end up in the water 200 yards down the course. If you strike the ball dead centre you better believe you will land on the green. The difference could be 30 yards either side of where you actually wanted the ball to end up.
You may be thinking, but Nick, “How does this apply to life instead of golf”.
There is a branch of mathematics/physics called Chaos Theory that has proven time and time again that the consequences of small actions can accumulate to incredible results.
Chaos Theory – the branch of mathematics that deals with complex systems whose behaviour is highly sensitive to slight changes in conditions, so that small alterations can give rise to strikingly great consequences.
What’s the small change that you can make today that will lead to incredible results later in your life?
5. We Have Control Of Our Own Energy State
I learned from Tony Robbins years ago that what we are feeling or thinking starts with our physiology. Studies have even shown that practicing a power pose daily for 2 minute can massively reduce depression, increase confidence and boost testosterone (for men and women)
Try a 2-minute power pose?
Tony Robbins talks power poses. Try standing with your chest proud, shoulders back. Like you are a super-hero.
What does it do to your mood? You feel confident right?
We have complete control over our emotional state, yet the majority of people believe that everything else controls our emotions. It’s true.
It’s become common in society to accept negativity. We need no excuse to feel bad nowadays and most people wake up unhappy. This leads to most people lacking in energy.
Think about it for a second, if you saw an insanely happy person bounding into the office saying “Isn’t it a beautiful day, I’m incredibly happy today for no reason”. You would send them to a therapist? Something must be wrong. Surely.
I personally feel that society has it backwards. Most of you know about my Daughter Sophia. She is one of the most energetic and happy children I know & I’m super proud of her!
But other parents ask us, “How do you cope, god it must be hard work having such an energetic child?”.
I always go on to explain that children are born with an abundance of energy, creativity, enthusiasm for learning and a desire to connect to other people. It’s society that gradually beats that out of them and I’ll never allow that to happen to Sophia. Children are truly beautiful to watch.
This got me thinking about how is it that we can capture some of that life energy back?
You can influence how you move your body, what you focus on, and the language you use to describe any moment.
Watch another fantastic ted talk to find out more about body language and how it can shape who you are.
6. The 6 human needs
This is something I have read about since being recommended the concept by a successful man I know. Tony isn’t the first to come up with this theory, it’s wildly taught in the psychology community.
Tony says that there are 6 fundamental human needs that we all share and that drive our lives. We generally value two out of the six needs most and we filter our life choices, decisions, and habits based on meeting these primary needs first.
The 6 human needs are…
- Certainty—assurance you can avoid pain and gain pleasure
- Uncertainty/Variety—the need for the unknown, change, new stimuli
- Significance—feeling unique, important, special or needed
- Connection/Love—a strong feeling of closeness or union with someone or something
- Growth—an expansion of capacity, capability or understanding
- Contribution—a sense of service and focus on helping, giving to, and supporting others
One person might meet their needs on a strong level of certainty, variety, significance, and connection through smoking cigarettes. They can feel certain or comfortable from smoking cigarettes whether it’s a habit they’ve had for a long time or because they can feel like they can relax from having a deep exhale.
They can feel variety because smoking a cigarette instantly changes your biochemistry and state. They can feel significant if they see smoking as a cool thing to do or being the guy or girl who offers someone a cigarette, and they can feel connection by smoking with others.
Another person can meet those same needs through daily exercise. They can feel certain that they’ll feel great and energised from exercising. They can experience variety through mixing up workouts, through the biochemical change that takes place in their body, and through training different muscle groups.
They can experience significance by being someone who values their body and by having a toned body. They can experience connection and love for themselves for taking great care of their body and by exercising with others.
Tony said that whenever we have a habit, emotion, or thought that meets at least three of our needs on at least a level of 6 out of 10, then we form an addiction. The fastest way to break an addiction is to replace the addiction with a vehicle that meets the needs or more needs in a better way.
Which two needs do you value most right now in your life?
7. Change your strategy, story & state to change your life
8. Decisions lead to destiny
It is not our circumstances that define our destiny, rather the decisions we make, because each decision we make leads us to a destination in our lives.
There are three decisions we’re always making consciously or subconsciously: what am I going to focus on, what does it mean to me, and what am I going to do about it?
What’s one of the greatest decisions you’ve made in your life? What would your life be like if you didn’t make that decision?
9. The 3 mandates of a leader
10. Success leaves clues
Want to accelerate your success then find someone who has already achieve your goals? You can avoid the time-consuming hasstle of trial and error by just modeling someone else.
A great example of this is the thousands of people who go it alone trying to lose weight. We all have that friend who has tried everything to try and lose weight but still hasn’t kept it off? This is a bad person to model by the way!
What you need to do is find some, a friend, family member, colleague ect who has achieve what you want to achieve. Maybe some of our case studies give you an example of someone to model your behaviors on. Each one of those people decided to save time, energy and disappointment by hiring a personal trainer.
Tony promotes modelling and immersion training as one of the best and fastest ways to achieve mastery in a skill or area of life.
What’s a result you want in your life right now? Who’s accomplished it? How can you model them to get the result you want now?
Bonus: Daily Routine To Empower Your Success